Relationship Success God’s Way

“Whenever you're in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.” – William James

Some years ago, an evangelist told me about his first date with his future wife. When she got in the car, he took notice she placed a bible between them on the seat. He asked her why she put the bible between them and she responded “if you are going to get to me, you will have to go through Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John first!” I never forgot that and I appreciated her placing God at the beginning and center of this possible relationship. I believe all new relationships would benefit greatly if they started out on this proverbial right foot.

The value of the Word of God is inestimable. Like food is to the physical body, so is God’s word to the spiritual man. It is referred to in 1^st Timothy 4:6 as food that nourishes the spiritual person. When the bible is kept alive by a husband and wife practicing its principles, then success is guaranteed. Their marriage will be nourished and be healthy instead of famished and dying. Colossians 3:16 says “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly…” When it lives in us then it creates sustained joy, peace, love, and develops our strength.

Feed on the word by

• Being committed to church and hearing the word preached.
• Read it daily
• Meditate on every day on what you read. Meditating is the mind fermenting what it is thinking upon. When something ferments then it becomes intoxicating and a person will be under the influence. The word of God, not the world, should be influencing our decisions and life.
• Practice it everyday

The following is a list of verses to enhance the quality of your relationship. If acted upon, the rewards will be protection, seeing things before they happen, avoiding pitfalls, and exposing what are my responsibilities in the relationship.

Be careful of what and how you say things.

Proverbs 12:18 (KJV)
¹⁸ There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword: but the tongue of the wise is health.

James 1:19 (KJV)
¹⁹ Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:

Remember, there are always two sides to every story.

Proverbs 18:13 (KJV)
¹³ He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.

Speak words that encourage the spouse.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 (KJV)
¹¹ Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.

Let love rule.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NLT)
⁴ Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud
⁵ or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.
⁶ It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.
⁷ Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Allow no competition to make the spouse feel less than your priority.

Genesis 2:24 (KJV)
²⁴ Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

Grow up and become mature by putting away the childish pursuits.

2 Timothy 2:22 (KJV)
²² Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

Remain committed to each other and accept each other’s family as your own.

Ruth 1:16 (KJV)
¹⁶ And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God:

Be careful of who your friends are.

1 Corinthians 5:9 (KJV)
⁹ I wrote unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators:

1 Corinthians 15:33 (NASB)
³³ Do not be deceived: "Bad company corrupts good morals."

Be honest and open with each other. If there is a misstep, be willing to forgive and permit healing to take place.

James 5:16 (KJV)
¹⁶ Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

1 Peter 4:8 (KJV)
⁸ And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.

Keep God at the center of the relationship at all times.

Psalm 46:5 (KJV)
⁵ God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved: God shall help her, and that right early.