HOW You Say It determines…

Tactful speaking and making what you say palatable to the hearer requires forethought and intention. Truth can be spoken but whether it is received depends much upon the one's attitude in speaking it. Think about it, if someone came up to you and revealed things that needed corrected in your life and all of it was true, however, they said it with a nasty attitude – how would you respond? Of course you would reject it, not because it was true, but because the attitude of the person turned the truth bitter.

The following story is from an unknown source but it illustrates the lasting impact of a right attitude.

John Wesley and a preacher-friend of plain habits were once invited to dinner where the host's daughter, noted for her beauty, had been profoundly impressed by Wesley's preaching. during a pause in the meal, Wesley's friend took the young woman's hand and called attention to the sparkling rings she wore. "What do you think of this, sir, for a Methodist hand?" The girl turned crimson.

Wesley likewise was embarrassed, for his aversion to jewelry was only too well known. But with a benevolent smile, he simply said, "The hand is very beautiful." 

Wesley's remark both cooled the too-hot water poured by his  friend, and made the foot-washing gentle. The young woman appeared at the evening service without her jewels, and became a strong Christian.

I have nothing against the wearing of jewelry but I thought the attitude of John Wesley made all the difference in this woman’s response.

Colossians 4:6 (KJV)
⁶ Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.

The purpose of salt is to:

• preserve foods
• improve taste – make palatable
• enhances the color of food
• A nutrient source

Finis Dake said in reference to this verse:

Let your speech be always spiced and seasoned with answers that will oppose sin and preserve from the corruption thereof. Let it be holy, wise, gracious, Christian, savory, wholesome, courteous, respectful, desirable, and worthy of being kept in the memory of others.

Salt in this verse has much to do with the attitude, or the way we speak the truth. Notice that Jesus doesn’t say “what to answer” but “how to answer” every person. Not that truth is unimportant, but the attitude makes the spinach of truth more palatable and ingestible for the hearer.

If you have been dealing with someone about salvation, or trying to get a person to see the error of their ways, and you are not seeing success. Don’t change the truth, change your attitude and see what happens. You might be surprised at the change in their response.